Tuesday, 7 May 2013

Do you coach or do you tell?


In a recent training programme I was encouraged by the managers on the course telling me how often they coached their people and how good they were at it.  I was then hugely disappointed to watch them in a role play situation spending all the time that they were allegedly coaching the individual telling them what to do.  Oh dear I thought, this is going to be a long, long day!!

What has happened is that many people, maybe you included, have thought coaching is about telling people what to do because, lets face it, you are the manager and you should know what to do!  However coaching is about you helping the other person to learn for themselves....this is not done by you telling them what to do all the time! In fact if you do this, the only thing they have learnt is that you will give them the answer and so they don't have to think!

So lets consider the key skills of an effective coach:

Questioning skills - this is not just about asking open questions.  It is about asking the right question at the right time which has the ability to allow a person to see things from a different perspective.  You will know when you have asked a 'killer' question as it will be obvious that your coachee has to think hard about answering it.  You need to question around making comparisons, encouraging the person to evaluate different situations as well as getting them to synthesise information.

Listening skills - once you have asked a question BE QUIET even if you find it is uncomfortable, you have to give the person time to consider their response, formulate that response and then respond.  So do not interrupt them!  But do make sure that it is obvious to them that you are paying them 100% attention, make encouraging noises and tell them, if appropriate, to take their time in answering. You have to develop a desire to listen and ensure that the other person does most of the talking.  You listen 70% and you talk 30% of the time is a good measure of how an effective coaching session should be.  Remember, never impose your solution onto the other person as then it will be yours and not theirs.

Action - Always make sure that both of you are clear about what the next actions will be and when they will be done by.  If you fail to do this there will have been no point to the coaching session.  Do not settle for 'I'll do it soon' or 'As soon as possible' make sure that you have a definite action and a definite delivery time that the action will be done by.  Agree a follow up meeting and make sure you turn up for it!

Coaching can happen anywhere at any time with people at any levels. The best coaching often happens when the coach has no knowledge of the subject or baggage about the relationships that the coachee wishes to discuss.  This can be hard in an organasational situation which is why as a manager you may find it useful to have a business coach from outside your company. It certainly has worked for me both as a coach and a coachee.

Thanks for your time, Suzanne Unsworth

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